Let's just keep adding it on....

Again here I am I haven't written in what feels like ages....I am not sure how to type without pouring my heart and eyes out....I have so many emotions right now I can barely contain myself...everyone always says God can only give you what you can handle...Really? Then why is he giving me so much and why do I feel like I'm drowning? He must think I am like friggin Hercules!!! Which I can admit...I am not...I mean I can do a mean squat still but darn...



In the last two months to be exact, I lost my Aunt (49 yrs old),
Cousin (33)and a good friend (33)...all unexpectedly....and the kicker...I find a lump in my breast 5 days before my 34th birthday...





HAPPY * BLEEPING BIRTHDAY....



Nothing right....80% of lumps are nothing...well of course Shawn was out of town.....so my neighbor went with me ....after about 3 hours of torturous mammograms & ultrasound tests. The radiologist, tells me in a slow motion dreaded voice...
" Mrs...it's a solid mass, it needs to be biopsed....any questions?"



Seriously? What! Questions ? Questions? What questions would I have other than WTF? How did the heck did that get in there? And can you change the answer? I know what you are all thinking...why is she freaking out, it's probably nothing...maybe you're right...I'm really hoping I'm wrong here...for the first time in my life....well because of the lump in my neck and the previous lump on my ear...I'm a lil freaked out...and to be quite honest...

The stats don't lie...about 40,000 women die each year from Breast Cancer. 1 out of 8women have a chance of getting invasive breast cancer each year. This is terrible... Think about this....you and seven of your closet friends, facebook buddies, whatever...I am glad the NFL is representing Breast Cancer, it has really opened my eyes. 1 out of those 33 will die...not very good odds....




So I don't care how old you are...early detection is the key...Hug your kids a lil tighter...sometimes your family...will always be shitheads...there's no hope for them...just know you are the best you can be and leave the rest up to God...I know he has a plan for me...God help us all if he puts me in charge of something...You all know me ...CONTROL FREAK!!! Watch out World!

LOVE YOU BISHES!!!! Til next time I will try better to write more often, just haven't had the motivation....But on a higher note...no pun intended...I watched the whole first season of Glee...LOVED IT! I am hooked now...it's just so damn funny and brilliant...just brilliant! Sue Sylvester makes me laugh out loud like no other! I know...I'm a loser! But hey I never said I wasn't....